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February 20, 2003

Well, hello there...

This morning, among the traffic, the rain, the first morning cigarette and the windshield wipers ("slapping out a tempo" Ha!) I actually heard a radio personality snort.

That set the scene for my day.

I have been lucky enough to receive tickets to see a comedian this evening with my boyfriend, hereafter called Mister. We do enjoy the stand up comedy, until it slip slides into the mindless dick jokes and sexual comments of a slightly tipsy and belligerent frat boy. But this woman is intelligent and her dick jokes are funny.

February 21, 2003

"That makes Jesus cry..."

5:00am during that weird half awake, lucid dreaming, cursing the alarm clock and trying to snuggle closer to Mister, I heard this phrase... "That makes Jesus cry." At first I didn't know whether to bray laughter or to remain silent. It was so funny and out of place, but yet I felt strangely blasphemous with my urge to laugh.

I was trying to get my hefty rump out of bed because I was going to be late for work (yet again) if I didn't start hoppin. So I disentangled my limbs from the sweet sleeping man beside me and I heard him say in this precious voice that I shouldn't get out of bed because that would make Jesus cry.

I hate to admit it, but laughter won out. Tell me I'm not going to hell.

Disjointed Ramblings:

My co-worker has this large print of the Lincoln Memorial and it slightly oogs me out. Maybe it's just the size of his giant head.

Another oog out... I have a band-aid on my right middle finger. I feel un-bendy and kind of nauseated by the sight of the fuzz that had become sort of stuck to the edges throughout the day. Just me? Ok.

February 24, 2003

Spinsterhood & Crummy Weather

What a wonderful weekend!

I got breakfast in bed yesterday morning. My man is so sweet. The poor thing had to go into the office early (like at the butt-crack o' dawn) to run a report or some such tomfoolery, and he brought back Krispy Kreme donuts. How sweet is that? I swear. I must have done something right in the past few years to warrant such an amazing boyfriend.

If this man gets any more fantastic I am going to have him tested to see if he is actually a pleasure-bot or something.

You know how when you are single and all of your friends are either married or hooked up with their significant others and you feel sorta fifth-wheel-ish? I felt like that for YEARS. I told my mother one time that I felt like a goober going out with all my married friends. And yep, she said it... the most eye-roll inducing phrase of all times... "When you aren't looking, Prince Charming is going to come out of nowhere and sweep you off of your feet." I never believed her, or any of the other frillion people who told me that (unsolicited even... what was that all about?).

I guess they figured that I needed to hear something positive after thinking for so long that I was basically 12 cats shy of being that woman. You guys know whom I am talking about. That woman that you hear about who died in her sleep. Her 13 cats quietly munching away on her flesh while the mailman shoves Amway catalogs in her mail slot. Her neighbors finally complain of a strange odor, and no one comes to her (closed casket of course) funeral.

Well, that was a nice little stint into the macabre.

Annnnnnnnnyway... My boss just came out to tell me to get the hell out of here, the roads are icing over and I have a long drive ahead of me.


Update from 2/27/03 We were actually off work for 2 whole days. Major ice storm. My boss lives a mile and a half from the office and if HE couldn't get into work, I was not about to try. I live about 40 miles away.


To continue with the string of thought from the previous entry...

I always thought that I would end up alone. Not that I was all that upset about the idea. Of course I wanted dates when important things would roll around. But for those I would use a friend and call them my surrogate boyfriend for the day. Men would ask me out, but I never really found anyone that I wanted to invest that much time in. I had almost resigned myself to a life of spinsterhood (oh geeze, lay off the melodramatics Suz, you are barely 30), and it really didn't bother me all that much.

I had, in all honestly, stopped looking.

You got it... I turn my back on reality for one darn minute and this amazing man rushes in and changes me forever. I am happy, giddy almost. I rush home everyday so I can spend time with him. I enjoy snuggling! Snuggling? You say? Yes, me... a snuggler. I look forward to the day when I can introduce myself as Mrs. Mister. He is sweet, intelligent, kind, loving, affectionate, funny, gentle, very manly and a great cook. I have hit the mother load people.

Yay me!

February 28, 2003

Old School & Smokin Rules

*Whew* It's Friday.

Maybe it's that I am a total health nut (shut up), or the fact that I am just a sucker for anything that facilitates multi-tasking, but these cheap-o brand Hot-Pockets ROCK! Can the processed cheeses be any smoother? I submit that they cannot!

I have a quandary. I just got new health insurance and they required me to take a tinkle and blood test (I studied HARD!). The blood tests were for cocaine and AIDS, the urine test was for tobacco products. Here's the situation... I, being a sneakster, looked up nicotine on the internet (ok, ok, so Mister did it for me) & found that it's half-life is 24 hours. Hence, (in my logic) in 48 hours the nicotine would be out of my system, including my liver, and I would pass the nicotine test with flying colors. I wasn't worried about the other two, but since I am a long time (not hard core) smoker, I was sorta concerned about the tobacco test.

Some smokers would laugh in my face, "Ha! You call 4 smokes a day being a smoker!?!?... Wuss."

I don't need to smoke and it hasn't been even relatively tough to not smoke for the past 3 days. Yes, 3 days... not 2. So I'm an over achiever, I just wanted to be sure.

Anyway, here is the deal Lucille. Now that I have been smoke free for 3 days, should I continue with my newfound smoke free lifestyle? Or fall back into the tawdry (but O so tasty) smoker life? The bad thing is that Mister took up smoking (he refuses to admit it) again. It was tough watching him enjoy the smokey goodness whilst I sat idly by. And every time I see some one light up in a movie or on TV I can't wait to join them. I am such a lemming.

I know that a lot of movie buffs will want to string me up for this next comment. I cannot wait to see "Old School". That movie looks completely mindless and hysterical! YAY! I'll keep you posted.

Cheesy Smoothness!!!!!!!!

About February 2003

This page contains all entries posted to Suzanna Danna in February 2003. They are listed from oldest to newest.

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