Ok, first off . I can not tell yall about the robe of degradation. Not yet. I must wait until I can take a bit of time to tell you guys all about that. And now? Is just not the time. No, my poppets, now now, is the time to panic. Now is the time to be a bit spazzy. Nay, even bajiggety.
I hate this conference. I do.
This is the time of the year when I have a three city, 38 speaker, 25 committee member, 1500 attendee monster to slay in the name of event planners everywhere. This? This is my Moby Dick.
Call me Ishmael.
No, really. I am having a serious problem over here. I thought, hey, bright idea! Lets pull our attendees kicking and screaming into the twenty-first century. Right? Lets forgo the tree killing fest that is all of the materials that we normally print for this conference. Lets give the attendees a CD-Rom with all of the materials ALL Of THE MATERIALS. Bonus, right? Right. So I cat wrangle and get every presentation from all 38 speakers. (A feat in itself and yes, I am taking a little bow.)
Now for the fun part.
I gave the master CD-Rom to the company that is going to reproduce 1600 of them for me.
They? The 1600 CD-Roms? Were supposed to be in my warehouse by 11/17/06. Oh, hello calendar. It is what? The 20th? Why that cant be! Because if that were the case, then oh, I dont know THEN MY MATERIALS WOULD BE LATE!
::deep breath::
I set up on Wednesday. For those of you who dont know, the next day; Thursday; is Thanksgiving Day. A day to celebrate with stuffing pie in your face and sitting on the back porch with your pants undone and a tall gin and tonic (with three olives!) in your right hand and a cigarette in your left. Thursday is not a day to be all ass clenchy about some stupid conference.
Thursday is a day to cook. A day to bake. A day to zurbert your niece and to look at pictures and watch football.
If I dont get set up on Wednesday. Then I will be shit out of luck come Monday
The 27th at say, oh, around 5 am when I get to the convention center and have to set up everything by myself in an hour and a half.
If my materials are even there.
Hate.
But I love yall. Love. Happy Thanksgiving Day . And just for you? A picture of the puppy watching his first cousin play soccer.
