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November 12, 2007

ALMOST FAMOUS

Okay, okay. Simmer down. Now, I know I promised to tell you about a boy named Dan and a brown dress. Or something to that effect, but that? Yeah, that can totally wait. This is much better.

Thursday at 3:49 pm I got a call from one of my favorite people on the planet. No, scratch that... in the freaking universe.

My brother. Not by blood, but by choice. [Image of me throwing a gang sign goes here. ... If I had an image of me doing such, but I don’t. You’re creative people. Use your imaginations!]

For a little bit of background on my brother, you may want to take a gander at the entry titled, “Brian, Shut Up and Eat.” There are pictures and everything. I fixed the formatting and the linkage. All for you guys. Because I love you, I am a lover. Or... OR... you could just take my word for it that he’s a stand up sort of guy. A creative and random guy with strange quirks and ass loads of talent, but a stand up guy nonetheless.

So Brian calls at 3:49... and I totally remember that time because he said, “Hey Sue, it’s Brian. I am slammed with sweeps week and I needed something to break up the monotony. I figured, hey... it’s 3:49 on a Thursday, that’s random enough, I’ll call Sue.”

See? With the randomness and the wit and quirks and shit? Told you, nyah.

But he called to get something from me. I had mentioned a few oh... months ago that [rummaging through inbox to cut and paste... also see... AM LAZY] ah, yes... here it is. I said, “I love seeing what you and your partner have going on. It is fun to look at that site. :) I have a site I'd like for you to see as well... but to get the address, we have to talk on the phone and I get to extract an absolute promise from you about sharing said page with family members and or barnyard animals and kittens... and your wife... the government... Eric [last name]... anyone who would tell my family the REAL things in my head... and maybe a dollar.”

So, the man was bored at work and wanted to look at... I don’t know. Porn maybe? Who could be his hook up for that? His old pal Sue. Not really, I had just piqued his interest with the extracting an absolute promise thing. Because he would totally give me a dollar if I asked nicely. [See “stand up guy” thing above.]

We talked, we laughed, we chased random tangents all over the place for a bit then I finally gave him the website. He was emailing me with corrections in about two hours. Several things (if they matter to you)... it was NOT Brian who told me about Carter’s skiing accident. And he is not responsible for what happened to Summer. Not sure what that means, maybe it was the streaking incident in her neighborhood that we were all involved in... not sure. Please explain my dear sweet brotha! And, he wants me to tell you guys that he “has mad numchuck* skills”.

*Spellcheck wanted me to substitute this with upchuck. Just saying is all.

I’m also saying that he almost brained me with said numchucks... nunchucks(?) as well, we’ll save that story for later.

What I did want to share with you fine, upstanding and sitdowning people was this. My wonderful, handsome and extremely funny brother has already written a guest entry.

And with that? I give you Brian. Applause please, he’s a total attention whore. Oh, and I only took the name of his lovely bride out so you sickos wouldn’t stalk them. (Psst... I’ll post his site if he’s cool with it and you can stalk him there.)

(I'm inspired... so I'm writing YOU** an article)

ALMOST FAMOUS

"Still go down to George's and drink my beer, drink my beer." - Pat Green

I have a wall of fame in my home. It marks all my brushes with greatness... and that's about it. I guess it has a "gee whiz" factor. But, I'm not really sure what it does for my self esteem.

(tape rewind sfx here)

Lemme explain. I've got mad skills... OK, in MY mind, I've got mad skills. I can rip some metal on the guitar... kinda. I'm a skilled voice over talent... as long as I don't charge for it. I'm good looking... if I'd loose 15 pounds. And I'm smart... albeit what I know is generally categorized as "useless information / good for Trivial Pursuit". I work in TV... but I'm not "on" TV. I'm almost famous.

So, maybe this wall is a testimony to THEIR brushes with "almost" greatness. Right? (OK, maybe not)

Anywhoo, it's quite a collection of various talents (but mostly music) that I gladly post over my slightly dusty Zakk Wylde signature Les Paul. There's the Nolan Ryan autographed baseball. There's the vintage Willie and Family album the Red-Headed Stranger signed for me for some work I did on a TV spot for him. The pick I snapped up out of the air from Kirk Hammett at the Metallica concert. There's the cocktail napkin that Vinnie Paul from Pantera signed to me and my lovely bride reminding us to "Eat More Pussy". There are the signed CD jackets from The Rev. Horton Heat and Gov't Mule (The Mule wanted me to "hang" with them backstage at their show... but I didn't. "The Rev" flirted openly with (Brian’s bride)). There's the crunched up ticket stub from the Misfits show that Jerry Only signed. Oh, Geoff Tate and the guys from Queensryche were glad to hang out and talk with me, sign anything and let me play their guitars. I've got the pictures to prove it.

But my favorite? It's got to be the shaddow box that holds various bits of yellow and black stuff. Among them the signatures of all the members of Stryper... plus, the picture of me, Marlon, Nathan and Tim outside the show. Timeless. Classic.

Oh, there are more. My job affords me meeting all kinds of folks. Plus, there's just the wierdness of life in general. But, I think some of the best ones aren't on the wall... the ones without the autographs that are the best... the ones with just stories. There was hanging out with Kenny Olsen of Twisted Brown Trucker (Kid Rock's band) and shooting the shit. There was catching John Bush of Anthrax off a stage dive when everyone else backed up... "Dude, you OK?", he asked. I asked, "Are you?" We both nodded, I put him on his feet and the show went on.

I had fun drinking beers with John McEnroe... and that bald guy from CSI: Miami.
There was the backstage pass at the Gibson Guitars showcase when I found myself standing in a circle that included Skunk Baxter of The Doobie Bros., Pat Green, Kenny Olsen (see above) and others (Eric Johnson was loading in behind us) and they were all asking ME what they should play. Don't ask me why they asked me.

I did pass Jada Pinkett Smith in the hall at work one day... she said, "hi".
Of course, what stroll down "almost" memory lane would be complete without mentioning "singing" with Trouble at their Nashville show. (I have the recording to prove it)

What does it all mean? Why do I keep it all? Inspiration? Aspiration? Assimilation? Is it just a chance to display some great stories visually... I do love telling stories. Sometimes I think it's to remind me of what I think I should have been. Sometimes I think it's to remind me to be thankful for what I have... and that their burdens aren't mine. And when I come to my most profound brush with fame, I think it's more the latter.

Ask me about my night with Steve-O sometime. You'll understand.

all love to you...
-B

**Yes, it’s mine. But I am sharing. Because I like to give. I’m a giver. Now show the man some love in the comments people, and if we’re lucky, he’ll write for us again.

About November 2007

This page contains all entries posted to Suzanna Danna in November 2007. They are listed from oldest to newest.

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