Archives
- 2008.07.01: I've been gone. I brought you this stupid t-shirt.
- 2008.05.23: Welcome to the Gun Show.
- 2008.05.12: Rawr! Blood Thirsty for 3 Year Old Girls
- 2008.04.29: Etsy Bitsy Coincidence... Or Lord, The World Is SMALL.
- 2008.04.14: Circus Story
- 2008.04.09: My damage, let me show you it.
- 2008.04.01: Clickety Clickety and Pictures. Also? Be nice.
- 2008.03.25: Want To Go To Austin?: Part III
- 2008.03.20: Want To Go To Austin?: Part II
- 2008.03.14: Want to Go To Austin?: Part I
- 2008.03.10: Conversation with Mike...
- 2008.03.07: Pinky Swear: Part II
- 2008.03.03: Busy weekend. You?
- 2008.02.28: Mister has found his love connection.
- 2008.02.22: Random Crap All Shoved Into One Long and Rambling Entry (Trips, Music, Easter and Passports)
- 2008.02.20: Procrastination.
- 2008.02.12: It was like poking a snake with a stick.
- 2008.01.31: Ridiculous socks... You know you want them.
- 2008.01.18: I started this post on... Tuesday.
- 2008.01.09: I feel like a T-Rex. (Rawr)
- 2008.01.03: If it ends in sex and some perfect black trousers? Rock on.
- 2007.12.28: Susan and Cheese = True Love 4-ever
- 2007.12.27: Everything goes except the brown sundress.
- 2007.12.26: I stalk and love you anyway.
- 2007.12.18: TurboFlush 4000
- 2007.12.05: Furious
- 2007.11.12: ALMOST FAMOUS
- 2007.10.31: “It’s half past the hour and I have done something stupid...”
- 2007.10.16: The Princess and the Pee
- 2007.10.09: Rehab
- 2007.09.12: Mothra.
- 2007.09.05: Gadgets and Stuff
- 2007.08.30: Hair Cut (HUGE PICTURE - SORRY!) and Re-Org
- 2007.08.21: Reeboks
- 2007.08.17: Housekeeping Items.
- 2007.08.10: Please keep personal phone calls a little more "brief".
- 2007.07.26: Like a beacon to the crazy...
- 2007.07.12: He mimed holding up a pillow to his little head.
- 2007.06.29: Pinky Swear - Part I
- 2007.06.27: I may be a bit over taxed.
- 2007.06.22: To be fun, I am also going to add some questions at the end.
- 2007.06.20: Adopt a midget.
- 2007.06.15: I prefer the term noncompliant.
- 2007.06.13: J.Ho called Steve to ask if she could bring two more to the party.
- 2007.06.07: It was awesome and I have an ulcer.
- 2007.06.01: "What in the world is that woman cackling on about?"
- 2007.05.25: It was official. A Rockstar weekend was being born.
- 2007.05.08: He was flingin that chainsaw all over the place.
- 2007.04.30: What's My Name Beeeyotch!?
- 2007.04.25: They are fired. Bad genes.
- 2007.04.23: Anyone else? Should we start a support group?
- 2007.04.20: I am mean.
- 2007.04.17: It is the goriest chick flick I have ever seen, and I loved it.
- 2007.04.13: I would have offered him a testicle if he needed it.
- 2007.04.11: "Okay, you are going to feel a little pressure."
- 2007.04.10: "If they find an olive on a toothpick in there you are going to have some explaining to do."
- 2007.04.02: I feel like someone punched me in the vagina!
- 2007.03.22: Bon Scott played the freaking recorder before he joined up/made/whatever AC/DC.
- 2007.03.21: Beer has nothing in it like meat!! Right?? Ha!!.... Huh?
- 2007.03.19: I am literally a big block of cheese.
- 2007.03.13: He said in a very small voice, "Well, it would be for me."
- 2007.03.12: Weeticoners, call me, I love you.
- 2007.03.08: Weetacon '07 Part III
- 2007.03.07: Weetacon '07 Part II
- 2007.03.06: Weetacon '07 Part I
- 2007.02.28: Crazy. Also, overly worried about her teeth.
- 2007.02.26: I did not stick to the paper on the examination table.
- 2007.02.20: We clearly could not handle having him.
- 2007.02.16: My love for muscle cars/vehicles is kept pretty much hidden.
- 2007.02.15: Happy Valentines Day to all of you. And yes, I should have posted this yesterday.
- 2007.02.07: I do not want to offend anyone with a boob.
- 2007.02.06: More than a nun, less than a paid professional.
- 2007.02.01: Meanwhile, back at the ranch...
- 2007.01.25: Here is a link of who I found (include link for my internet stalking purposes).
- 2007.01.24: A streetlight doesn't even come close.
- 2007.01.18: My hotness (as opposed to the size of my ass) will eclipse the sun.
- 2007.01.08: You are supposed to comfort me in times of dismay.
- 2007.01.03: Can you hear the
lambs sheep screaming Clarice?........fffffpffpffffff
- 2007.01.02: I am about as outdoorsy as Joan Collins.
- 2006.12.29: We decided to dress Chad up as apparently the world's tallest and hairiest woman.
- 2006.12.27: It was the bestest day ever.
- 2006.12.18: I'm looking at you Cider House Rules... Damn you John Irving!
- 2006.12.12: The texture of the cloth on the outside was so rich and creamy I wanted to roll around on it.
- 2006.11.20: Happy Thanksgiving 2006
- 2006.11.07: He was already answering to something akin to "Hey Vagina! Come here!"
- 2006.11.03: It has ceased to be!
- 2006.10.30: His crotch looks GREAT!
- 2006.10.16: Would it be okay if I crashed his "All ME All the time" weekend with my parents.
- 2006.10.04: But then again, I don't get embarrassed easily. See also: I like the song London Bridge by Fergie.
- 2006.10.02: Sick sense of humor... and bad timing.
- 2006.09.29: Nice chairs, sure, but I have been out here for almost an hour.
- 2006.09.22: My Evening with The Mary Kay Lady - And Steph.
- 2006.09.18: It was his world, I was just living in it.
- 2006.09.14: I was finishing up college and needed an elective course for one of my semesters.
- 2006.09.12: It's 2:30 p.m. and I haven't vomited yet.
- 2006.09.08: Who wants Stormy?
- 2006.09.01: Pros & Cons 9-1-06
- 2006.08.29: "Get your facts straight before you complain."
- 2006.08.21: I also have an unhealthy obsession with Corey Hart and or George Jones.
- 2006.08.14: This was supposed to be something about not being able to travel with lip gloss, but I got side tracked.
- 2006.08.08: His knee, that I affectionately refer to as FrankenKnee ...
- 2006.07.31: It can never bode well for the slutty one.
- 2006.07.27: Five Random Things and Something About Eating Hotdogs
- 2006.07.25: There... Instant Dial Up Access
- 2006.07.24: All I found was some lame ass "note" in my Outlook called IDEAS.
- 2006.07.13: I Got My Hair Did.
- 2006.07.07: Are you sure it isn't a rabbit? What about a rat?
- 2006.06.28: My best impression of Kevin Costner in Dances With Wolves.
- 2006.06.27: Goodbye Jenn See, We Love You
- 2006.06.21: My Second Home - Destin, Florida
- 2006.06.02: A riding crop, a tutu, a midget in a clown outfit and some flippers.
- 2006.05.15: She was about an inch in size and I decided to name her Gladys.
- 2006.05.12: Scratch Fiction: Frank
- 2006.05.10: I say Expo/Home Depot schedule a weekend class to teach how to build a ladder, and climb it to get the hell over themselves.
- 2006.05.08: Rocks your face off.
- 2006.05.04: It was so cliché... a cheerleader dating a football jock.
- 2006.04.26: "Dear Packrat Jr.,".... oh, I know you didn't.
- 2006.04.21: I've never sent him to a prison and had him drown for my entertainment before either.
- 2006.04.19: You do NOT need a bigger boat.
- 2006.04.17: A massive case of pee shivers.
- 2006.04.11: Oh, Hi Morty.
- 2006.04.07: Anyone levitate or have an urge to rebuild a carburetor?
- 2006.04.06: "Took a bunch of little naugas to make that couch."
- 2006.04.05: THE HOUSE
- 2006.03.28: Happy Birthday Punkin!!!!
- 2006.03.17: It's not like I had a meth lab in my room.
- 2006.03.15: Long days and pleasant nights...
- 2006.03.07: I have NO CLUE what to title this one.
- 2006.03.02: I looked like a monkey humping a football.
- 2006.03.01: If I cooked a largish yeti...
- 2006.02.23: Brian? Shut up and eat.
- 2006.02.21: Kick His Ass Sea Bass!
- 2006.02.20: Three Year Anniversary
- 2006.02.16: Weekend With Friends in Nac Part IV
- 2006.02.13: Weekend With Friends in Nac Part III
- 2006.02.09: Weekend With Friends in Nac Part II
- 2006.02.06: Weekend With Friends in Nac Part I
- 2006.02.01: I'll just hide in the bathroom. The. Whole. Damn. Time.
- 2006.01.30: Comfortable
- 2006.01.27: And a good time was had by all.
- 2006.01.20: I was not sure if I had just contracted some sort of fungus...
- 2006.01.17: Mini Reunion Planned
- 2006.01.16: Wesley from Princess Bride cutting off his own foot
to spite his face maybe?
- 2006.01.09: Y'all know I love zombies.
- 2005.12.30: There is No Arizona
- 2005.12.30: That was a special treat just for me.
- 2005.12.21: I am going home to see Jesus.
- 2005.12.20: Administrative Nightmares Ensued
- 2005.12.15: Look! It's Me!
- 2005.12.07: Door to the kitchen? O-Pen. Cat? Nowhere.
- 2005.11.16: Before she got all Jesus-y.
- 2005.11.03: You should turn yourself around and come on home.
- 2005.11.01: Fall is my favorite time of the year.
- 2005.10.27: What Texas Means To Me
- 2005.10.17: Sue Asks the Mirror: "How old are you Susan?"
- 2005.10.12: Andy Dick is asking me to help him adjust his g-string.
- 2005.10.07: He lived across the street and I would lock him in my room.
- 2005.10.05: Like Wynonna but a lot less "Tranny".
- 2005.09.20: Rules of Cheese Club
- 2005.09.16: Digressing again Phyllis!
- 2005.09.16: Hallmark isn't the devil after all.
- 2005.09.13: Weekend Conversation with the Moms
- 2005.09.09: Idiosyncrasies
- 2005.09.07: Trip to Chicago
- 2005.09.01: I am going Shopping!!!!... In Stacey's closet.
- 2005.08.30: Goodbye Sonny
- 2005.08.23: The Portfolio
- 2005.08.19: Most incredible BarBQ you have ever put in your face orifice.
- 2005.08.17: I Blame My Sister
- 2005.08.15: K
- 2005.08.12: It was a very surreal experience, almost synesthetic in nature.
- 2005.08.09: Six hours of my life that I will never see again.
- 2005.08.03: 100 Things I Like
- 2005.08.01: Hotness in Six Steps
- 2005.07.28: I've never smelled Britney's perfume... really.
- 2005.07.26: Weird Hairs.
- 2005.07.18: The Power of Google
- 2005.07.15: The traffic just parted in front of me like I was Moses.
- 2005.07.14: The Road to Baton Rouge - Part Four
- 2005.07.13: The Road to Baton Rouge - Part Three
- 2005.07.12: The Road to Baton Rouge - Part Two
- 2005.07.11: The Road to Baton Rouge - Part One
- 2005.07.06: I have a multi-colored scarf and purple leg warmers.
- 2005.06.28: I'd like to take this time to overtly make fun of Earl.
- 2005.06.24: I have bangs now. BANGS.
- 2005.06.21: Open mouth, insert ugly white patent-leather shoe that I am sure I was wearing at the time.
- 2005.06.20: I will be sure and wear my sexy pleather-like pants.
- 2005.06.16: "You can't Handle the TOOTH!"
- 2005.06.15: Updated Banners Page
- 2005.06.13: Shut up bra making people.
- 2005.06.09: The Kingdom Hath Spread
- 2005.05.31: Just To See You Smile
- 2005.05.27: Join Us for Dinner... a Look Back.
- 2005.05.18: The red light demands respect y'all.
- 2005.05.16: Mysfit Interview
- 2005.05.13: Let's go to New Orleans... tomorrow.
- 2005.05.10: My mom was more popular than I was. And sadly, this is not a fabrication.
- 2005.05.05: BJ and the Bear
- 2005.04.27: April is freakin weird.
- 2005.04.21: Let's play the question game.
- 2005.04.20: Update on the Story Crossing.
- 2005.04.14: Story Crossing
- 2005.04.13: Squire of the Alley
- 2005.04.12: Linkity Link Link Bitches!
- 2005.04.09: Royal (second) Wedding
- 2005.04.08: It was so beautiful we had to get out and...pee.
- 2005.04.05: Heartbreaks over expectations never verbalized.
- 2005.04.04: Get Out. Of The Trunk. Now, Please.
- 2005.03.31: Did you guys see my little tangerine turtle?
- 2005.03.29: So.... Where have You been?
- 2005.03.21: I will give you money... and kittens.
- 2005.03.17: He has the bedside manner of a heavy handed Harley Davidson grease monkey.
- 2005.03.16: Internal
Convict Conflict
- 2005.03.15: Thine Hath Had It Up To Here!
- 2005.03.09: My personal tragedy will not interfere with my ability to do good hair.
- 2005.03.02: You. Are. My World.
- 2005.02.28: "There are special angels for children and drunks."
- 2005.02.22: Today. I have Barbados hair.
- 2005.02.21: Entry Number 150
- 2005.02.14: Knights of the Tiny Round Tables (In Thongs)
- 2005.02.09: Happy Birthday Husband, In other words... sorry I suck.
- 2005.02.04: After the big bucket of crazy, anything seems great?
- 2005.02.01: Do night terrors mean anything to you?
- 2005.01.31: I was so relaxed, I half snored.
- 2005.01.21: I'll Be Your Huckleberry
- 2005.01.19: Don't come back without two sleeves of Saltines.
- 2005.01.18: The Other Chad Interview
- 2005.01.14: This causes a problem, as I am not a fan of retching.
- 2005.01.10: Stephanie and I were totally oiled up with a mixture of baby oil and iodine.
- 2005.01.07: 100 Things About Me
- 2005.01.05: Today is National De-Lurking day!
- 2005.01.03: I muttered to myself, "Traveling through hyperspace ain't like dusting crops, boy."
- 2004.12.27: I did find true love on the Internet. Once.
- 2004.12.20: It's so good that if you put it on top of your head, your tongue would slap your brains out - trying to get to it.
- 2004.12.17: I have approximately 6 shopping days left and not one leetle present wrapped under the tree.
- 2004.12.14: Looks like an octopus attached itself to my face and won't let go.
- 2004.12.10: My butt would not unclench about this conference
- 2004.11.18: They were young, they needed the money.
- 2004.11.08: Tone Loc's "Funky Cold Medina" would act like some sort of homing device for my girlfriends and I.
- 2004.11.05: Names changed to protect the drunk and disorderly.
- 2004.11.02: What the Hell is this then, Distemper? Scurvy?
- 2004.10.15: I got all mixed up and started including Smurfs.
- 2004.10.13: Nothing will make my gorge rise faster than something furry in the fridge.
- 2004.10.07: "Hello, My name is Elvira. I am snazzy and also? I will cut you."
- 2004.09.21: I am finally the type of girl that my parents would be proud of... when I finally don't give a shit.
- 2004.09.20: Elvis is the King of KAHNGS!
- 2004.09.15: Have y'all heard that song Goodies by Ciara?
- 2004.09.14: Somebody.
- 2004.09.09: So, as the boys took care of that business, corn-fed gimp and I took care of Bessy.
- 2004.09.08: A row of little question marks appears instead.
- 2004.09.01: He said her name would be Thomas Elizabeth.
- 2004.08.24: The one where I sort of disappoint you.
- 2004.08.18: Yeah, I just linked Fabio to the Bible.
- 2004.08.17: Because apparently, I am a twelve year old boy.
- 2004.08.16: So, yeah. I am clearly Pinky to Mister's Brain.
- 2004.08.12: I've been Googling (like a mad bastard).
- 2004.08.11: The Sound Of Sunburn
- 2004.08.09: Everyone put on their bathing suits but me, because I, as we have realized before, am a genius.
- 2004.08.06: On the border of Texas and Louisiana: Texas Longhorn Club
- 2004.08.04: Mister: I think I would rather concern myself with Biloxi Bob.
- 2004.07.29: Yeah, I'm the kid on the right that looks like a young boy.
- 2004.07.23: The rampant James Van Der Beek humping.
- 2004.07.22: I am always amazed at my luck for being born into this family.
- 2004.07.14: Like a Lamborghini Thunder Star with Wings or something.
- 2004.07.13: My left pupil was all jacked up, cracked out, Courtney Love on Letterman and shit.
- 2004.07.12: You got it... bucket of crazy was wife number three.
- 2004.07.07: Reb's Choice
- 2004.07.02: But on a plus side, my hair looks like complete and total crap.
- 2004.06.30: "Nah, you don't look like a lesbian."
- 2004.06.28: Mister declares that he is going to start a company called the Mexican Connection.
- 2004.06.22: "Could my hair BE any more like Elaine from Seinfeld?" I asked myself.
- 2004.06.21: Of course, I am speaking of our Pat Boone albums and my precious moments collectibles.
- 2004.06.04: Just One of the Guys Part 2
- 2004.06.03: I have had many firsts on its white-sanded beaches and in it's turquoise waters.
- 2004.05.12: Why oh why have you forsaken the birthday princess?
- 2004.04.29: Just One of the Guys (Part 1)
- 2004.04.22: My crack dealer...Er I mean the lady in finance gave me a sample of it to try.
- 2004.04.16: I will NOT have you hanging off of my breast like a piercing.
- 2004.04.12: It will keep you from shitting the bed at 4:27 am
- 2004.04.08: I've seen dyslexic spelling bees that were more organized.
- 2004.04.01: A pimple the size of Satan's hoary ass.
- 2004.03.31: Two sweaty kids fumbling eagerly with zippers in the front seat.
- 2004.03.25: A molting Kimono dragon with wicked-bad flatulence...
- 2004.03.24: Baz Luhrmann is so going to kick my ass.
- 2004.03.23: I just heard the word spa and had a mini braingasm.
- 2004.03.18: Corn-fed Harvest Scientist
- 2004.03.11: On Being 21.
- 2004.03.10: Hot Barney
- 2004.03.09: I got nothin.
- 2004.03.04: Mental Enema or Vain Glory?
- 2004.03.03: My Uterus, the Martyr.
- 2004.03.02: John Cleese's Nipple
- 2004.02.27: Google Me This..... Cheese Omelet
- 2004.02.23: Email from Co-Worker C
- 2004.02.20: Dr. Goatee, Links and Some Guilt
- 2004.02.17: Are You There God? It's Me, Suzanna Danna.
- 2004.02.16: Thank You Cupid. [wink wink, nudge nudge]
- 2004.02.11: He Ain't No Ike Turner.
- 2004.02.09: This Wasn't Pavlov's Dog
- 2004.02.02: Weekend Synopsis and a Bit About My Body
- 2004.01.22: Phase One of Mister's Birthday
- 2004.01.21: Almost A Year.
- 2004.01.09: Firey Pits, Poopin Dogs and Panties
- 2004.01.05: Loosing a little bit of myself.
- 2003.11.25: Bathing Cats and Employment!
- 2003.11.10: Karmic Boomerang
- 2003.10.13: Absence - The state of being away.
- 2003.09.16: Spanklin's Spanish Inqusition
- 2003.09.12: Fo Shizzle P-Dog!
- 2003.09.09: Happy Tuesday!
- 2003.08.25: Ya Ya Weekend Wrap Up
- 2003.08.22: Oh, to be Jo...
- 2003.08.13: Flamenco Fran
- 2003.08.12: Pestilence and Pizza
- 2003.08.07: Oh Happy Day!
- 2003.08.01: A Diamond & My Devil Dog
- 2003.07.29: Flock o' Flamingos and other niceties
- 2003.07.25: Rollins In My Eye
- 2003.07.22: Back from N'Awlins!
- 2003.07.01: Fear & Loathing in "Lost Wages"
- 2003.06.18: Wednesday is for Wincing.
- 2003.06.16: Boss Bastard & Butt Boogie
- 2003.06.13: Fear and Loathing in North Dallas
- 2003.06.11: Strippers & the office don't mix.
- 2003.06.09: Would the REAL Debra Jean please stand up?
- 2003.06.04: Cast
- 2003.05.30: I'm gonna be a Star!
- 2003.05.28: Baby Huey... SEXY!
- 2003.05.22: New Design and a bit of 'Shine'
- 2003.05.07: Daddy V in the Hospital
- 2003.04.29: Day 2 of 90
- 2003.04.24: I need a nap.
- 2003.04.22: Gitchy Gitchy Ya Ya Easter!
- 2003.04.17: Buggy Apology & a Dream
- 2003.04.16: It's a Practical Joke Beeyotch!
- 2003.04.15: Amusements (Let's talk about sex!)
- 2003.04.09: I deserve a Dorky Parade!
- 2003.04.08: Survey #1
- 2003.04.03: Makes Sense...
- 2003.04.02: Lucid Dream and Living Dream
- 2003.03.28: Don't Stop Sexi-Mexi!
- 2003.03.26: Home again, home again....
- 2003.03.20: Tinkle Bell
- 2003.03.17: Monday Mindless
- 2003.03.13: Earth, Wind and Fiber
- 2003.03.13: Balllllllllllllllllll One!
- 2003.03.12: I'll take a cup of black stallion please?
- 2003.03.11: Skelator always rings twice.
- 2003.03.07: Voice Lessons
- 2003.03.05: I Want Candy!
- 2003.03.03: Larva & Louisiana
- 2003.02.28: Old School & Smokin Rules
- 2003.02.24: Spinsterhood & Crummy Weather
- 2003.02.21: "That makes Jesus cry..."
- 2003.02.20: Well, hello there...